Al Posted February 5, 2003 Share Posted February 5, 2003 >Aaron - ugly but hung like a horse, prone to belly button fluff. >Adam - cute, funny, chicks dig him, well hung but very caring. >Adrian - usually short and very horny, watches cartoons. >Alan - shy but sensitive, gets screwed over by women. >Alex - cute and short but a liar and a cheat. >Alastair - Dirty, Smelly, Pecker is minuscule. >Andy - boring and has a small pecker. >Andrew - gay and still has a small pecker. >Antonio - has a great body and beautiful skin, and chicken brain. >Anthony - great guy and kind to all girls, smells of weed. >Arnold - loser. >Arthur - hung like a slave and celibate. >Barry - lights fires, pinches girls bottoms and is well hung.. >Ben - funny and can be real difficult to beat at games. >Bill - funnier than Ben and always wins the game >Bob - quiet and unpopular, eats with his hands. >Brad - thinks everyone likes him...but they don't. >Brandon - good looking but uses girls. >Brendan - quiet and sweet, gets beaten up all the time. >Brett - world wide slut and really insensitive, women love him. >Brian - mean and only thinks of himself, no he's not the Messiah he's >just a naughty boy. >Bryan - sexy, but stupid - can't spell. >Bronsen - annoying and never grows up - has a stupid name. >Bruce - stinks bad and thinks everyone else's name is also Bruce. >Bryce - fun to be with and will make you laugh, you'll kill him within a >week. >Calvin - immature in a naive way, drives a Skoda. >Carl - thinks he's funny...he's not, falls asleep during sex.. >Carson - fun to be around and really sensitive. >Chad - cute, sensitive and very studly - only found in US movies no real >person has that name. >Charles - can't trust him, eyes too close together. >Chris - can't pull, has to pay for women, but has a huge pecker and can >use it too. >Christian - very sexy and seductive (think 'Legends of the Fall'). >Clark - hilarious and always in trouble, problem with 'jailbait'. >Cliff - very sweet and adores girls, but very superficial. >Cole - nice, funny, and fun to be around. >Con - lies to women and blows up public buildings. >Cory - funny but ugly, ends up running fashion magazines. >Craig - tries to fit in - he never does. >Cyril - well, Cyril. >Damon - total loser in a sweaty sort of way. >Dan - quiet but funny, but becomes easily addicted to narcotics. >Dane - weird but can hold together a conversation with a mermaid. >Daniel - enjoys root vegetables in every orifice. >Darren - charming , but sleeps with men. >Daryl - smells bad, has no real mates >David - hotty and works out a lot, loves girls named Florence. >Dave - extremely sexy, always funny, intelligent, stylish, trendsetter - >i.e. a whacker. >Dean - full of himself and thinks with his dick. >Dennis - either very nice to girls or a faggot. >Derek - has a great sense of humour, and blow-up doll collection. >Dominic - hilarious and will do anything to please. >Don - dickhead. >Doug - has a greasy face, drinking problem and farts. >Drew - bad-arse losers who never shuts up. >Dylan - horny b*stard, who can't sing. >Dwayne - cool guy to be around if you can handle his name. >Eddie - wants too many chicks he'll never get cos he's an arsehole. >Edd – Loves knifes, guns, bit of a psycho >Emrys - Load mouth gobby Shitte. >Elliott - Full of himself >Eric - shy. >Erik - funny and treats girls how he wants to be treated. >Evan - a little slow but sweet, sexy, and model mental patient. >Frank - "different" - missing DNA - favours girls named Lucy. >Gareth - sweet but dresses too good to be straight. >Gary - drug addict but willing to share. >Gavin - likes bondage, S&M with other men. >Geoff - prefers golf to sex and war to peace. >George - barman who drinks more than he serves. >Glen - the sweetest guy - really down to earth >Greame - very hard to understand, likes group sex >Graham - will screw anything >Grant - HORNY! but so sweet and you can talk to him about anything. >Greg - really sweet and feels sorry for himself. >Harry - Covers his back >Harvey - cute, but addicted to sex and/or drugs. >Hathem - smooth, but very manipulative, not to be trusted around young >girls. >Haydn - tries hard. >Howard - likes small-breasted women and pornography (doesn't >everybody!). >Ian - really popular but knows all the girls want him...yeh right!!! >Jake - shy and sweet but a slut when drunk. >Jamie - Scum of the Earth. >James - hung like a horse. >Jay - very sweet when you get to know him well. >Jeff - really ugly. >Jerome - gay, but very unhappy. >Jeremy - loud and thinks that he's all that he says he is. >Jesse - unpopular and needs to move on. >Jack - stupid but hot. Always alright. >Jim - sweet, has fantasies of love and affection. >Joe - built like a bear, sexy but tends to lose his head. >Joel - arse. >John – clever, good with hands - tends to kill small animals. >Jonathon - think he's good - he's Shite. >Jordan - sexy but weird in bed. >Jose - hot boy with a love of hermaphrodites. >Josh - full of himself, fun. >Junior - hotty and totally good at football. >Justin - aggravating but lovable, insecure but successful. >Kain - the sexiest guy alive but very stuck up. >Kevin - Always attracts really fit girlfriends also has a large penis, >really nice to women. >Keith - good person to talk to when you have a problem - his is worse. >Kenneth - very, very...anything you want him to be. >Kim - very understanding and caring, feels lost in Korea. >Kurt - can kick anyone's arse. >Ky - see Kain. >Kyle - hornball who eats too many cornchips. >Larry - cute but wannabe player with big arse. >Laurey - short and funny looking. >Lee - girl dressed up as a boy, total arse bandit. >Lewis - lonely, sad git, bit of a plonker. >Lyndon - can always be found in bed or in the pub. >Liam - loud mouthed arsehole, normally found in rock bands and pubs. >Lorenzo - fine and dresses in stolen gold. >Lucas - fat loser that dates other men. >Luke - seems to be sweet - Luke Solomons exactly! >Malcolm - tall man who tends to lose his trousers. >Marc - Fantasises about pretty lights, doesn't drink, doesn't smoke - >Tries to tell everyone >Martin - loves himself, low maintenance, can be good in the sack after >lots of beer >Mark - wished girls liked him for who he is not his great looks, mouthy >b*stard though. >Matt - the Fat Boy of the class, likes sweets and is full of Shite. >Michael – Thinks every girl fancys him, very good looking but he'll do anything for a girl, >which is totally sweet. >Mick - always drunk, tendency for drug abuse. >Mitchell - the ugliest dog and he don't get any. >Mohammed - Small Penis >Nathan - stupid as hell, and tends to make others feel dumb. >Nick - HORNY! but really nice - can't get past the missionary position >though. >Neil - sweet and will do anything in this world for you, great in bed. >Oliver - likes men but is in denial. >Oscar - loser, a good name for a dog. >Owen - cute gay guy who is immature, and sings Welsh songs. >Patrick - drunk, drunk, drunk. >Paul - cool, calm and handsome, a quality only found in gays.. >Peter - cutie but very shy, makes women feel like virgins. (SEE WHAT I >MEAN) >Phillip - stupid idiot who wishes he were cool. >Rashpal - C**t >Ray – likes dvds, Elvis, good looking, can be a git. >Reagen - ...strange. >Rhys - great lover but had his mind stolen by aliens a long, long time >ago. >Richard - cant see his feet balls are to big >Ricky - ugly shithead who everybody hates. >Rikki - see above. >Rob - constantly watches porn. >Roy - total loser and computer genius. >Rupert - arrogant T*at who is crap in bed but thinks he is a stud. >Russell - likes to play in the leaves which makes him an arsehole. >Ryan - short but sexy body and even sexier mind. >Sam - wannabe sex machine. >Scott - has serious disabilities, total arsehole. >Sean - has small testicles and no friends. >Seth - so sweet to other people but is a traitor. >Shane - thinks everybody wants to shag him - he's a virgin. >Shannon - the most determined and persevering sweetie in the world. >Shaun - bit of a hard b*stard, thinks women love him. >Simon - likes a night out with the lads and curries. Talks balls. >Steve - popular and funny when looked at side-on. >Stuart - droll guy with great arse and suicidal tendencies but Great in >bed. >Tim - hot but a bit strange, can never tell where he is. >Toby - best blow ever. >Tom - cool but can be arrogant. >Tony - hot, sweet, kinky, kind and totally fun to be around, likes the smell of own poo >Travis - fat and horny with the best XXX collection to be found. >Trevor - sweet and funny but sometimes untrustworthy. >Troy - cute and popular. >Taylor - gay. >Warren - cool, homosexual guy. >Wesley - great guy and easy to tolerate. >Will - wishes he were popular. >Zach - sweet and polite and adorable. >Zahid - devious and sly. Not to be trusted. > > >AND HERE ARE THE LADIES >Ada - Blue haired, smells of wee. >Aileen - laughs like a demented dog. likes tic tacs >Alison - Bra and pants are the same garment, looks better with the light >off. >Amanda - I.Q. tends to be smaller than bra size. Probably a good shag >though. >Amy - Devious, Likes being on top, never stays the night - Not to be >trusted. >Andrea - Small breasts, drinks pints. >Angela - Vain, Hair style more important than oxygen. Usually found >hanging around toilets. >Annabelle - Virgin. >Annette - She's BIG. >Anne - Looks like a horse, can't drive. >Barbara - Shags like a rabbit, not fussy about appearance. >Belinda - Pleasing on the eye, usually has a couple of good points. >Beryl - Repressed alcoholic. >Beverley - Trapped in an eighties timewarp. >Bianca - Ginger. >Bridgette - Eats pizzas all day, smokes cigars. >Britney - Falsely improved, no use to society. >Camilla - replaces the word 'yes' with 'ya'. >Carina - Looks like the back of a bus, doesn't swallow. >Caroline - Lard arse, shaves her ears. >Catherine - Attracted to the older man, needs ironing. >Claire - Usually neurotic, gives good head, can have lesbian tendencies. > >Celine - Emits hideous noises, waste of DNA. >Charlean – Likes other women, Drugs, Singing, sometimes a pain but sweet >Charlotte - Enjoys tea and cake, farts the national anthem. >Cheryl - Can fit hand in mouth, eats glass. >Christine - Likes men in uniform, never warm. >Daisy - Virgin. >Danni – Fat Slag, Should make nice threesome with sibling. >Davina - drug induced mental damage, should shave her neck. >Dawn - Gets up early, smells of chips. >Deborah - Bites the pillow, uses both hands. >Denise - Sits on cats eyes, wears too much make up. >Diane - Enjoys company of animals. Deep as a puddle. Adds nothing to >society. >Donna - 70's throw back, likes cabbage. >Doris - Purple haired, stinks of wee. >Eileen - Eats scabs - lesbian tendancies with big feet >Elaine - Rides side saddle, drinks meths. >Elizabeth - Born to rock, hates chickens. >Emily - Wears odd socks, can have lesbian tendencies. >Emma - Gullible and easily swayed by a good looker! Gives fantastic >blow-jobs (apparently!) >Estelle - Likes wombles, eats grass. >Esther - Plump with sagging breasts, normally heavily tattooed. >Faith - Legs met at knees, can't shag standing up. >Faye - Wears wellies, can't swim. >Felicity - She'll stab you with her nipples, plays darts. >Fiona - Female mud wrestler, gives head. >Francine - French. >Gabrielle - French too. >Gail - Farts a lot, drinks Guinness. >Gayleen - Big tall woman who talks shite all day. >Gaynor - Lesbian. >Geraldine - Too posh for her own good, likes flying. >Gillian - Dyes her hair green, likes clubbing. >Gina - Eternal mother, eats nappies. >Glenda - Eats children, hates smoking. >Georgina - Wants to be a man. >Gwyneth - Blubs a lot, wees in the bath. >Hannah - Needs to be naked at all times, eats kebabs. >Heather - Shags like a freight train, a screamer. >Helen - Hangs around with the wrong crowd, Kinky in bed, loves porn. >Heidi - The hills are alive with the sound of music, likes gherkins. >Hilary - Frigid. >Holly - Prickly to the touch, seasonal shagmeister. >Imogen - Drinks tequila from the bottle, wets the bed. >Ingrid - Right wing Nazi tendencies, never smiles. >Isabelle - necessary on a bicycle? >Jackie - Heroin addict, sold her child. >Janet - Massive over bite, no neck. >Jane - Babe, I'd drink her bath water. >Jasmin - Smells of sewers, eats the heads off rats. >Jemma - Does anal, wears too much eye make-up. >Jennifer - Huge breasts, should shave her legs more often. >Jessica - Virgin, always will be. >Joanne - Moans in her sleep, cant cook, moans when she wakes up - I >wouldn't! >Jordan - Ha ha ha ha ha - nuff said. >Judy - Huge tits, married to an arse. >Justine- Massive tits, likes hanging around men's toilets. >Julie - Jabba the Hutt's sister, constantly pregnant. >Karen - Can strip wallpaper from 60 yards just with her voice, waste of >DNA. >Kate - see Catherine. >Kelly - smells of cheese, slobbers when kissing. >Kerry - highly strung, nice tits, very popular with business men >Kimberley - wants to be a bloke, drinks like a bloke, farts like a >bloke, wears a wig. >Kirsty - Eats live moles, can't dance. >Kirsten - Doesn't like men. Doesn't like women. >Kylie - Can't sing but who cares - BOING !!!!!!! >Kym - Illiterate parents - see Kim. >Lana - Hated by her parents, accidental pregnancy. >Lara - Action packed, never seen naked. >Laura – Likes Big Bikes, funny, reads to much. >Laurie - Pert breasts, seldom ventures out at night. >Leah - Likes outdoor sex, wees standing up. >Lena - Eats food then throws up, rapidly shrinking. >Leslie/Lesley - Likes bondage, hates men. >Linda - Teenage bride, can swallow oranges whole. >Lindsey - Likes doggy style, doesn't do housework. >Lisa – Sweet, pretty, Will take all your money and run, gets turned on by porn and fat blokes, >Lorraine - Constantly whinges, will strip for a packet jellybabies >Louise/a - Phwoooorrrrrrrrrr, Boing Boing Boing. >Lucy - Strange dancer, wants to marry her dad. >Lynne/Lyn - Bad singer, likes firing guns >Madeline - Drives like a bloke, likes tractors. >Maggie - Trainspotter, likes plaid. >Margaret - Lovely mother, very generous. >Maria - Bangs like a barn door. >Marie - Life sapping dominatrix. Likes men to do DIY. >Marina - No get up and go, rusty underwear. >Marolyn - Eats like a horse, out stays her welcome. >Martina - Ugly lesbian. >Martine - Can't act, can't sing, nice tits. >Matilda - Likes dancing, mainly the waltz. >Mary - had a little lamb. >Meg - Cheesy smell, should be spelt with an S. >Melanie - Can hold 2 bar vacuum orally indefinitely. >Melissa - Eats dogs, been in prison 6 times for burglary. >Meryl - Dances like an ape, doesn't realise. >Michaela - Likes animals, should make a video with them. >Michelle - Wears white stilettos, dances round her handbag. Talks to much, sometimes >says the wrong thing >Marsha - Big butt, small brain. >Monica - Doesn't swallow, should have. >Naomi - Wannabe diva, more of a diver. >Nancy - White hair, remembers tanners. >Natalie - Eats with her mouth open, farts the Nokia phone tune. >Natasha - Had seven kids before age 17, needs ironing. >Nell - Hasn't realised WWII has ended, lives in Kent. >Nicola - Slapper, alcoholic in denial. >Nina - Stuffs her bra with tissues, been single for years. >Olga - You can park a bike in her arse crack, excessive facial hair. >Olive - Oily skin, oils up well. >Olivia - Neutron bomb. >Pamela - Gives amazing head, made of plastic. >Pat - Butt ugly lesbian. >Paula - Transvestite merchant banker for Basildon. >Penelope - Pitstop queen, likes men to be stiff. >Phillippa - Forest forager, likes wild boar. >Petra - Dead dog. >Priscilla - likes painting with oils, Duckhams mainly. >Rachel - Amazing gravity defying breasts, can grip a tenner in her arse >cheeks. >Rebecca - Hairy armpits, orgasms without contact. >Rhonda - Help me, help me. >Rosalind - Whahey, nuff said. Maybe 10 years ago. >Rose - Can be prickly, good head giver >Roseanne - ERRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH. >Ruth - She measures up well, one of life's greatest people. >Sadie - Stand up if you're slim, please stand up. >Sally - Drives a Mustang, fights in pubs. >Samantha - Loves her brother, has 4 deformed children. >Sandra - Shags donkeys for fun, bow legged. >Sarah - Likes pressed flowers and body piercing. >Selina - Doesn't wear pants, heavy laundry bills. >Shania - What? >Shelley - Dumb blonde but writes poetry >Sharon - Shags like a locomotive, yo-yo knickers. >Shirley - Can swallow a Curly Whirly whole, likes bananas. >Sian - Does mean sheep impression, hates mint sauce. >Simone - Used to be a shotputter from Cardiff. >Sinitta - who? >Sonya - Dirty lady of the night. Often referred to as a "carrier" >Sophie - Brothel madam, wears a wrinkly corset. >Stacey -Likes cut off jeans and arseless Speedo's. >Steffi - Closet lesbian, maintains heterosexual relationship for effect. > >Stephanie - Eats Muppets, wears Brogues. >Sue/Susanne - should shave more often, wears Denim aftershave. >Tanya - Hot minx, too short. >Tara - Upper class slapper, needs extra chemicals. >Tiffany - who? >Tina - Face like a smacked arse, should eat less. >Tori - Lives in a hedge, can't water ski. >Tracy - Easily swayed by alcohol. Mostly seen without underwear. Loves >kittens. >Tracey - Lesbian. >Ulrika - ka ka ka ka ka ka ka ka. >Ursula - Likes puppies, in curry. >Veronica - Round and likes having sex infront of cameras >Vicky- Likes Yoga. And Women. >Wendy - Possibly a man. >Yvonne - Inhales petrol while skipping with worn tights >Zoe - Talentless rock chick. Prepared to use sex as a weapon.. >Zandra - Strange appearance, eats guinea pigs dipped in chocolate. Al. 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Colin Posted February 5, 2003 Share Posted February 5, 2003 Zoe - Talentless rock chick. Prepared to use sex as a weapon.. Ok Zoe, lets go to war, i've got my weapon! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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